Colossians 3:18-19 NKJV

[18] Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. [19] Husbands, love your wives, and do not be bitter toward them.

When I was doing everything but what God wanted me to do, I LOVED pointing fingers at my wife. She doesn't do this, she doesn't do that. I had mastered the art of blame-shifting to the point that I had no responsibility for our marriage failures. It all fell on her. She was too needy. She asked for too much. I DID MY "JOB."

Oh, the foolish arrogance and hypocrisy I paraded around.

My wife's husband was a special sort who required a disastrous breakdown to recognize his (my) need for Jesus... and her need for me to need Jesus. Neither one of us gets it right all the time. We still have our moments, but every dynamic in our marriage changed when I stopped serving myself and started serving God.